We’ve gone from using dating apps as the customary order of business to swiping for solace. Technically we are using them like we did in the before times, but the circuitry in the platforms and in our bodies is confused. I cringe when that guy sends a message, dreading the endless small talk. But then he…
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I'm an Associate Professor in the School of Health Studies at Western University in London, Ontario. An anthropologist who works with sex workers, people with HIV/AIDS, and Indigenous populations, my special research interests include sexuality, gender, and the politics of health. Along with academic writing and activism, I regularly write social media articles about sexuality, relationships, dating, and popular culture. I'm currently working on a memoir that explores my hilarious, humbling, and sometimes harrowing dive into the darker side of dating apps. I live with my cats Elliott and Jhona in London, Ontario. Yoga, art, reading, cooking, and finding new ways to experience the world are some of my favourite things to do.
Walking into Myself
“Your life is a movie, I swear,” one of my students said in a recent text conversation about post-pandemic travel, dating, and Italian men. We were discussing the bland Tinder offerings in our respective phones and how disinterested people seem to be in talking to one another. My roster has the photos of thirteen men,…
Read MoreTelling Tall Tales: Being Catfished on My First Pandemic Date
Having recently departed a relationship, I’ve been mulling over a lot of things. One specific thought that keeps floating through my mind is whether I can stomach being on a dating app again. Just thinking about it makes my digestive system turn and not in a fluttering butterflies way. Weighing the fleeting chance of sexual…
Read MoreThe Trolley
Trigger warning: this article discusses subjects that may be difficult for readers. The topics include suicide and young death. My thoughts have slowed since yesterday afternoon when he left for the last time. They trail behind me like washed up buoys I thought I had disposed of, becoming more tangled with each waking hour. How…
Read MoreRosewater & Food
I adore the look of turbans that are worn by Sikhs and other cultural communities for various religious and practical reasons. I also love them as a fashion item, a pinnacle of refinement. Elizabeth Taylor comes to mind, who donned them often in the 1960s-70s. Those sparkling violet eyes, a sea of gemstones glimmering on…
Read MoreUnder the Bloom
Today starts with the customary 5 am wake-up call from Elliott, which I pretend to ignore in a futile attempt to stretch out the inevitable. I like when she and Jhona gather with me in the dark, stepping on my body like bedroom adventurers claiming their territory. We communicate in chirps, meows, and love. Once…
Read MoreIs this still available? My adventures on Facebook Marketplace.
PLANTS 2 snake plants, one with pot 3 blooming cacti 1 large cactus and basket PICTURES/FRAMES 2 picture frames 2 flower-bird pictures 2 huge women and flower paintings PILLOWS & DRAPES3 ‘boho’ pillows 2 blue pillows 4 panels of damask drapes FURNITURE 1 pink office chair 1 “Renaissance” chair 1 green office chair DECORATIVE ITEMS…
Read MoreIs American Gun Violence a Form of Cultural Cannibalism?
I wondered this question while listening to the news about the mass shooting at King Soopers grocery store in Boulder, Colorado, the second of its kind in the last seven days. These events are the product of structural, social, and interpersonal factors, and endless streams of paper, protests, and policy revisions have been used to…
Read MoreIt’s been a year: Writing my way through the pandemic
When the maelstrom of masks, mandates, and mass retreat began a year ago, I began a special writing project. Housed in a Word file called “Corona writings”, it is intended to be a record of all the things I have written since the pandemic began. It includes creative writing, academic articles and book chapters, and…
Read MoreRED
The boldness drips from my brush as I rock out to Florence & The Machine. “Oh Patricia, you’ve always been my north star…You remind me that it’s such a wonderful thing to love.” Written for Patti Smith, it’s one of my favourite songs. Instead of the flowing Gucci dresses Florence wears, I am covered in…
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