Sixty minutes before my date is set to arrive and I begin doing crunches on the pink area rug in my office. Jhona brings his ball upstairs and plunks it down a few feet away from me. He stares with huge eyes in the dark hallway. I’m feeling calm and a little uncertain as I…
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Palm
Love travels a sticky flow of energies that ignite, excite, and sometimes cool. The meaningful relationship I Tindered my way into a year ago has come to a close. My heart is tender but ok. This relationship taught me a lot and was by far my most healthy, which I’m proud of and grateful for.…
Read MoreEmerald
We are drawn to the things we need, so goes the gemstone lore. If courage and protection are required, reach for tiger’s eye. Tapping into calming feminine energies that also ignite your intuition can be accomplished with the blue marble beauty of rainbow moonstone. Emerald recently spoke to me from inside a homespun store full…
Read MoreWhy should I perform your erotic capital?
The responses to my public writings about dating have been very varied. I’ve had lovely emails, article comments, and DMs from women and men who support and relate to my experiences about sexuality, gender and digital life more broadly. The trolls, incels, and conservatives who ‘believe in equal rights, just not feminism’ have also crawled…
Read MoreToad Totem
Since Elliott’s harness arrived two weeks ago we have been enjoying daily jaunts outside. The first jaunt begins around 6-6.30 am, which I affectionately call “Morning Glory.” But prior to putting the pink flamingo straps around her neck and under her arms, there is much preparation. It’s amazing to see how intent she is to…
Read MoreDesigning Calm During Covid-19
While clipping my fingernails in the bathroom sink a couple of days ago, I heard my neighbour across the hallway blow-drying her hair. For over a decade, I have listened to this sound almost every day. Yet, it struck me as something profoundly different that morning. It ceased being the white noise of apartment living…
Read MoreMy Mother’s Jacket
Moving is fundamentally about deciding which material items stay and which go. Some of my decisions in this regard echo Marie Kondo’s joyful approach to “tidying up” in the sense that I actively engage in a dialogue about what my stuff means to me. Such discussions do not involve the items easily tossed into the…
Read MoreBe a Lady They Said
“Be a lady they said” was written on December 6, 2017 when Camille Rainville, now twenty-two years old, was studying at the library on the University of Vermont campus. Rainville created her blog Writings of a Furious Woman to spotlight the now viral 785-word poem read by Cynthia Nixon during the three minute fashion film released…
Read MoreTop Types of Bumble Men: Nice Men who Travel…and More
I’ve written and thought a lot about the men I met and observed while scrolling through the Bumbleverse. Men choose a staggeringly diverse array of images, in terms of number, quality, and content. But, a few key types emerged, including the “Chill Adventurer” that I discussed a few blogs ago. Here, I want to share…
Read MoreBumble Basics: Retrospective Reflection from An Anthropologist
I spent five months inside the Bumble hive and write about these torrid experiences from the perspective of an anthropologist who studies sexuality and a woman trying to date. I found the Bumbleverse a tough place to break into in a meaningful way. The preference for messages over meeting was one of the perplexing observations…
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