The Night is Still Young

Sixty minutes before my date is set to arrive and I begin doing crunches on the pink area rug in my office. Jhona brings his ball upstairs and plunks it down a few feet away from me. He stares with huge eyes in the dark hallway. I’m feeling calm and a little uncertain as I…

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Why am I obsessed with Big Little Lies?

I have asked my mom to get me the book Big Little Lies, by Australian author Liane Moriarty, for my birthday. In our family birthday lists are still requested and happily furnished, even on the cusp of my 48th year. Last night I finished watching the two-season series for the second time in as many…

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In case you missed it

We all have our morning routines, right? Mine usually begins with pretending to be asleep while Elliott, my lovable and domineering orange Tabby cat, patrols the parameters of my bed. I lay motionless while she does her rounds and then hops on the bed, heading straight for my face. There are incredibly urgent things that…

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Palm

Love travels a sticky flow of energies that ignite, excite, and sometimes cool. The meaningful relationship I Tindered my way into a year ago has come to a close. My heart is tender but ok. This relationship taught me a lot and was by far my most healthy, which I’m proud of and grateful for.…

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We love you Michelle, but dating is more than monogamy & marriage

It feels sacrilegious to disagree with the former First Lady, but her recent comments about Tinder demand some teatime. On the September 6th episode of The Michelle Obama Podcast with guest Conan O’Brien, she said: “you can’t Tinder your way into a long-term relationship.” The dating app dis prompted hundreds of people to post their Tinder success…

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Emerald

We are drawn to the things we need, so goes the gemstone lore. If courage and protection are required, reach for tiger’s eye. Tapping into calming feminine energies that also ignite your intuition can be accomplished with the blue marble beauty of rainbow moonstone. Emerald recently spoke to me from inside a homespun store full…

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Why should I perform your erotic capital?

The responses to my public writings about dating have been very varied. I’ve had lovely emails, article comments, and DMs from women and men who support and relate to my experiences about sexuality, gender and digital life more broadly. The trolls, incels, and conservatives who ‘believe in equal rights, just not feminism’ have also crawled…

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My Mother’s Jacket

Moving is fundamentally about deciding which material items stay and which go. Some of my decisions in this regard echo Marie Kondo’s joyful approach to “tidying up” in the sense that I actively engage in a dialogue about what my stuff means to me. Such discussions do not involve the items easily tossed into the…

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The electric moon

And then her head explodedInto a slithering coil of eels Charged hot and nervousWith mislaid energyAmid the viral pause of the planet The old order tumbles out of her bodyIn layers of opaque feelingsPlants push throughBuds taste the grey airYet she cannot grow Why has she come undone?No cough, no one in the hospitalJust the…

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Dueling Narratives: Restitution, Chaos & …

My mind whirs less and attaches itself to familiar things. Work is finally possible, previously purchased food is eaten, and love still flows. This slowing down has been tempered, however, by another feeling that has surfaced: guilt. In unprecedented times, letting my guard down signals danger to the ancient flight-fight response system that streams through…

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