We are drawn to the things we need, so goes the gemstone lore. If courage and protection are required, reach for tiger’s eye. Tapping into calming feminine energies that also ignite your intuition can be accomplished with the blue marble beauty of rainbow moonstone. Emerald recently spoke to me from inside a homespun store full…
Read MoreAll articles filed in 2020
Emerald
Why should I perform your erotic capital?
The responses to my public writings about dating have been very varied. I’ve had lovely emails, article comments, and DMs from women and men who support and relate to my experiences about sexuality, gender and digital life more broadly. The trolls, incels, and conservatives who ‘believe in equal rights, just not feminism’ have also crawled…
Read MoreTop Types of Bumble Men: Nice Men who Travel…and More
I’ve written and thought a lot about the men I met and observed while scrolling through the Bumbleverse. Men choose a staggeringly diverse array of images, in terms of number, quality, and content. But, a few key types emerged, including the “Chill Adventurer” that I discussed a few blogs ago. Here, I want to share…
Read MoreEnough of the ideological stuff (for now) let’s get into the stick of it.
So far, I’ve reflected on some of the weird and frustrating aspects of my five months within the Hive. But, now I want to share more of the personal side of my experiences using Bumble in a fumbling attempt to search, flirt, date and do what bunnies do. Please join me in a tantalizing travel…
Read MoreDo you ever feel like Bumble is putting the sting back into the sex wars? #MeToo
I chose to go on Bumble because it came with the promise of a fem-forward, sex positive, not-so-stigmatized route towards dating, tristes and maybe something more solid. I appreciated Bumble’s appeal to professionals (or just people with functioning cortexes) and promise of a first-ever feminist-oriented algorithm and method of connecting. However, as I scrolled and…
Read MorePutting the “D” in app dating
MUCH has been written about the dick pic as a harmless rite of passage for sexually active young adults and an often-unflattering mode of sexual communication used by men to the dismay of most women on the receiving end. Indeed, a culture of resistance to the dick pic has emerged over the past few years,…
Read MoreIn the Eye of The Feminist Shitstorm
The first article about my Bumble experiences was published in The Conversation on July 28th (https://theconversation.com/love-lust-and-digital-dating-men-on-the-bumble-dating-app-arent-ready-for-the-queen-bee-120796), and whaaaat a nerve it has struck!! I knew it would ruffle a few feathers but didn’t think so many rufflestiltskins would reveal so much anger. About what, you ask? Not dating apps, which was the focus of the…
Read MoreBumble Basics: Retrospective Reflection from An Anthropologist
I spent five months inside the Bumble hive and write about these torrid experiences from the perspective of an anthropologist who studies sexuality and a woman trying to date. I found the Bumbleverse a tough place to break into in a meaningful way. The preference for messages over meeting was one of the perplexing observations…
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The puzzling case of men’s online dating profiles
Wild, wonderful and absolutely bizarre – that’s how my book begins its explanation of the profiles I encountered during my five months on Bumble. A picture may be worth a thousand words, but trying to figure out what my male counterparts’ pictures were portraying was more difficult than locating non-abstract facial features in a Picasso.…
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